I Am Going Insane.

I had to write anything today. I am just going insane here. I don’t know what to do. I felt like I couldn’t breathe before, but now I feel like I am fully drowning. I hate debt. I hate feeling powerless. I hate these negative emotions invading my mind as if demons were trying to chain me down while they try to crush me with the weight of my own misery and anxiousness towards debt and mental problems. People are suffering more than me somewhere in the world, so I don’t want to sound conceited. But I don’t know what I am supposed to do anymore.

I want to believe that things will get better but my mind is toying with madness and my sanity is being diminished like in Eternal Darkness and Amnesia: The Dark Descent. I just need to see monsters and will officially go to an asylum. I can’t sleep sometimes. I am afraid of what tomorrow will bring. I feel so very pathetic. I feel so worthless. I wonder, does my life hold meaning? I want to think that yes, it does. I feel like I am going to die of sadness but I don’t want to surrender myself to hopelessness. I wish somebody could help me. God, please help me.

 ♫ I wish somebody would empty my head

I am so sorry for the things that I've said

The hopeless feeling that's living inside

I'm just a lonely soul who's trying to find some peace of mind ♫

Peace of Mind - Black Sabbath